Sweet Baby

As a teacher I can’t help but often wonder why kids act the way they do –where they learned their impeccable manners or their incredible rudeness. I’ve always assumed it was at home that they gained these traits – and having a baby has made me believe that even more in some ways, and less in others.

Nora is a sweet baby. I know probably all parents think that of their children (at least I hope they do). And perhaps I just think it because I love her and want her to be sweet, but watching her over these past two weeks has given me evidence.

Today at gymboree, after a long cranky afternoon (I said she was sweet, not perfectly happy all the time) we went to gymboree to enjoy some air-conditioned playground time. After a little while of watching everyone else and staying close by me, Nora took off like she normally does. She went and handed balls to an 8 month old baby and to another mom. She did “row row” in the boat with another boy, who quickly got out once Nora got in. And she enjoyed jumping on the fluffy mat with another boy who also ran to his mom’s side as soon as Nora (who was much smaller) came around. She likes people and probably misses the babies at daycare. As I was paying, the little boy who had been on the mat with her was playing with the puzzles and Nora decided to join him. He dropped two puzzle pieces under the table. Nora crawled under to get them and I thought she was surely just going to use them for her own amusement, but she didn’t. She handed them to the little boy. I teared up right there in gymboree. The boy’s mom said, “She’s a social sweetie.” And I said yes and tried to pull myself together.

The night before, as I was cleaning up from dinner, Nora found her doll laying on the window bench, still covered with her washcloth from when she had been put to bed there hours earlier. Nora grabbed her, said “hi bebee,” and toddled off to the living room. I kept loading the dishwasher and hoping Nora would remain occupied. She did. I peeked over since it was too quiet to be safe and saw Nora kissing and hugging her baby. How sweet that she was being sweet to her doll. I secretly – or maybe not so secretly – hope she likes dolls since I did. And watching her kiss that “bebee” made me tear up again.

Which brings me back to my first point about why kids act the way they do. I always assumed parents have molded their kids into the people they are, but Nora was born a people person, a smiler, a happy baby. The gymboree episode had to be just from her. I know I’ve never “taught” her to go and play with others or to hand back puzzle pieces. I am not the social butterfly she seems to be – and neither is Ken – so that sweet part of her personality had to just be there.

Which isn’t to say that I haven’t played some role in her sweetness. Loving her doll hopefully grows from the love she’s gotten since she was born. I can’t help but kiss her chubby cheeks all day as we play and read and laugh. Even when she wakes up way too early – I still kiss her. Part of what made me tear up when I saw her kissing her doll was that she clearly notices how we treat her – with love and kisses (though we don’t carry her around by the arm or cover her with a washcloth).